Tomorrow (today)

In twelve hours our first All You Can Jet flight leaves JFK airport toward Boston. I have to leave here before 5AM in order to avoid sitting in rush hour traffic for hours upon hours. Well, technically, I could wait until 9AM when traffic thins out, but I'd be cutting it close, very close. So 5 it is. No biggie, except for the child who is currently ranting and raving about how much he hates Boston and doesn't want to go, instead of sleeping. This ranting obviously leads to a lack of sleep for both of us. Which will lead to more ranting and an all out miserable time tomorrow, I'm sure. Yay!!! I'm so excited to be doing this cool stuff for my ever appreciative son!! I'm thinking that I will either try to sell him to Mormons in Salt Lake City on Thursday or ask a kind herd of buffalo to adopt him as one of their own in the Grand Tetons. Boston's too close, and I can't think of any group there to take him, as I'm guessing the Mayflower Society types will surely notice his profound lack of manners different accent. Ahhhhh, fun.

I should probably decide what we're doing tomorrow and figure out how to get there, but I do have a few more hours. Packing a bag would probably be good too. Finding a bag in which to pack our supplies for the day might be better. Eh, we don't need much. I did check the weather forecast though. It's supposed to be hot and mostly sunny, I think. Yay!!! I also checked the weather in Grand Teton NP. Snow mixed with rain is forecast for Friday. It's so weird for me to consider snow in September. I'm just glad it means Ian will probably not get to try his latest trick. He finally stopped dropping his pants to his ankles when pissing in the woods. Instead, he unzipped, stood at the edge of a not-very-large-but-still-kinda-big cliff, thrust his pelvis and arched his back while screaming, "Fire Away!!!", then proceeded to piss in as large an arch as possible, all while laughing hysterically. It was great. I was hoping to see it replicated in a large park with actual cliffs. (I'm lying.)

I'm ovulating, which means: a) I get diarrhea b) I get gassy c) I get car sick / nauseous even easier than normal d) I break out e) I'm (even) bitch(ier than normal). Nature's contraceptive-- that's me!!!! The timing does not help the situation involving the ranting child. But usually when it's hardest to get somewhere I have more fun than I was expecting to have, although I probably just blew that little theory by typing it, huh?

Finally

Whew! I have finally decided upon our first trip out of JFK. I know you're all waiting, holding your breath, wondering which hour-long flight I will take after driving two hours to the airport and checking in at least an hour early. Don't do the driving math, please. It may make me cry. Fuck, I just did enough of it in my head to be bothered. Anyway, we're going to Boston!! I've only been there once and I absolutely hated it, but, eh, it'll be better this time. I picked Boston because it has the most public transportation options available. After booking the flight, I decided to check the taxi rates in Boston. Unfortunately it also includes a time estimate. The 45 minute public transportation route that seemed pretty good gets clocked in as a 14 minute taxi ride at around the same price as bus and whatever other fare for 3 people. So, basically, I could've gone wherever the hell I wanted. *sigh*

(On a completely unrelated side note, our dog will only come onto the sofa after being invited-- while we're home, anyway-- which is good. Except now for some strange reason you have to pat the sofa with your left hand, patting it with the right one will produce only stares and cocked ears.)

Uh, where was I? Oh yeah, Boston. Duck tours were recommended by several different people in several different places, and they start at a science museum, so that's the plan. Tourist ride in an on-road, bright fucking yellow boat. But Ian will have fun. I hope. Let's just hope he doesn't have to take a shit that day. Anyone have any suggestions about how to get him to stop describing his bowel movements in vivid detail?